Friday, July 13, 2012

Sometimes, I hate Google

I am a big fan of Google, but that does not blind me to the things that drive me nuts.

Recently, I attempted to register a domain through Google. Mid-way through the process, I was interrupted. When I returned to complete the transaction, I got this evil error message:

"We found an existing order for this domain. Please contact support."

But, there was no link.

The moment I observed that there was no link for "support" I knew the minions of hell had just labelled me a new log to toss into Dante's Inferno.

"Support"? Have you ever tried to contact a live human being at Google? The lack of a link was a clear indication that Google has no intention of my ever finding the pot of support gold at the end of an invisible rainbow.

So, I did a search (no, will not say I "Googled" the message, I'm mad right now) and found no shortage of people who'd experienced the same torment. There were plenty of suggestions for how they managed to get around this madness:
  • clear your browser cookies (one guy even added with the enthusiasm of a child with a shiny nickel in his hand when the ice cream truck played that horrible out-of-tune tune, "no need to even shut down your browser").
  • clear your cache
  • use another browser
  • use incognito/private browsing
  • use another compter
Each of those who offered one of these suggestions made sure to rub it in by asserting with abject confidence that "that oughta take care of it, you'll be all set, and Bob's your uncle."

Naturally, not one of these suggestions worked for me.

So, I went and searched again (yep, still mad). And I found this suggestion: "wait 8 days."

Wait. Eight. Days.

Do these people understand we live in 2012. Does anything take eight days anymore? A car can be a pile of parts at 8am and drive off the assembly line at the end of the same day...but I've got to Wait. Eight. Days. In order for this to clear?

Even Lucifer himself must have gone over to his minions and said "guys, this is a bit much, wouldn't you say? Give the poor SOB a break." Or, maybe he gave them a raise.
There was one other suggestion. Go to Go Daddy, register the URL, and then move/transfer/whatever the language is that will move the URL to my blogspot URL (not this one). What bugs me about this is that Google is supposed to be simple, unlike some other popular blogging platforms (  WordPress ). I don't want to have to get a degree in computer programming in order to do something that should and could have been as simple as it was fixing to be before that error message cursed me (there's a reason this blog is called "Non-techie Talk" - I'm a non-techie.)

So, in this microwavable, ready-in-five-minutes, instant, just-add-water, always-on world, I'm trying to give more money to a company worth a gazillion dollars yet somehow can't afford to hire a customer service staff to take of the people creating all that money, and must wait. eight. days in order to do it.

And, in that time, I'll surely cool off. And will enjoy gmail for the brilliant email service and client it is. And wish that working with Google was as easy and efficient as gmail.

And, no, I don't wish death upon Google. I don't want a world without gmail. It's just frustrating to come to terms with the fact that their success makes them smug, unassailable, impenetrable, and increasingly inhumane. This cruel and unusual punishment should not be the product of a company that purports to be a leader in the tech industry. It's just wrong.


cat trax said...

Sometimes I hate Google hard on people and small businesses at times like with their Penguin updates. So many people trying to do what they think Google wanted and got shot down. We still don't know what we did wrong...nothing...but they think we did, I guess. Guess we'll never know.